Conquer Public Speaking Fear

How To Conquer Public Speaking Fear

Public speaking is a common source of stress for everyone. Many of us would like to avoid this problem entirely, but this is hard to do. Whether we work alone or with large numbers of people, eventually we will need to speak in public to get certain tasks accomplished. And if we want to be leaders or achieve anything meaningful in our lives, we will often need to speak to groups, large and small, to be successful.

The truth about public speaking, however, is IT DOES NOT HAVE TO BE STRESSFUL! If you correctly understand the hidden causes of public speaking stress, and if you keep just a few key principles in mind, speaking in public will soon become an invigorating and satisfying experience for you.

Purpose Of This Report

The purpose of this Special Report is to help you overcome the fear of public speaking. It begins by discussing ten key principles to always keep in mind. If you approach any problem in life with the right starting principles, everything else will fall into place. On the other hand, if you start with the wrong guiding principles, you can try all you want, but there is little chance you'll improve.

This Report also reveals eleven "hidden" causes of public speaking stress. I have summarized these eleven causes, along with the ten key principles, at the end of this Report, so you can easily review them.

Key Principles

Principle #1--Speaking in Public is NOT Inherently Stressful

Most of us believe parts of life are inherently stressful. In fact, most of us have been taught to believe that life as a whole is very stressful!

I conquered the fear of public speaking, so can you! It just takes the right guiding principles, the right understanding, and the right plan of action to make this goal a reality.

Believe me, it's not difficult. I'm a good example of someone who conquered the fear of public speaking. And while I didn't do it overnight, it wasn't difficult. All it took was approaching the problem in the right way.

Principle #2--You Don't have to be Brilliant or Perfect to Succeed

Many of us have observed public speakers and thought to ourselves "Wow, I could never be that smart, calm, witty, entertaining, polished . . . or whatever." Well, I've got news for you-- you don't have to be brilliant, witty, or perfect to succeed. That is not what public speaking is all about. I know it may look that way, but it's not. You can be average. You can be below average. You can make mistakes, get tongue-tied, or forget whole segments of your talk. You can even tell no jokes at all and still be successful.

The essence of public speaking is this: give your audience something of value. That's all there is to it. If people in your audience walk away with something (anything) of value, they will consider you a success. If they walk away feeling better about themselves, feeling better about some job they have to do, they will consider you a success. If they walk away feeling happy or entertained, they will consider their time with you worthwhile.

Two or Three Main Points

You don't have to deliver mountains of facts or details to give your audience what they truly want. Many studies have shown that people remember very few of the facts or information speakers convey. While you may choose to include lots of facts and information, you only need to make two or three main points to have your talk be successful. You can even have your whole talk be about only one key point, if you wish.

Principle #4--You also Need a Purpose That is Right for the Task

This principle is very important . . . so please listen up. One big mistake people make when they speak in public is they have the wrong purpose in mind. Often, they have no specific purpose in mind, but the one that is operating within them unconsciously causes a whole lot of unnecessary stress and anxiety.

This is a prime example of what I call a "hidden cause" of public speaking stress. When I first started speaking in public, I thought my purpose was to get everyone in the audience to approve of me. I mistakenly thought that this was what good public speakers try to do. I wasn't consciously aware of this purpose, nor how foolish it was, but it was there nonetheless.

Principle #5--The Best Way to Succeed is Not to consider Yourself a Public Speaker!

While it may seem paradoxical, the best way to succeed as a public speaker is not to consider yourself a public speaker at all.

Many of us have distorted, exaggerated views of what successful public speakers do. We often assume that to be successful ourselves, we must strive very hard to bring forth certain idealistic qualities we presently lack.

Consequently, we struggle desperately to emulate those personal characteristics of other speakers which we wrongly believe are responsible for their public speaking success.

In other words, we try to become someone other than ourselves! We try to be a public speaker, whatever that image means to us.

Principle #6--Humility and Humor Can Go a Long Way

While each person will eventually find his or her style of public speaking, certain maneuvers can be used by almost everyone. Two of these, humility and humor, can go a long way to making your talks more enjoyable and entertaining for your audience.

Humor is well understood by most of us, so little needs to be said about it here. If being humorous feels comfortable for you, or if it fits your speaking situation, go for it. It usually works, even if you don't do it perfectly.

By humility, I mean standing up in front of others and sharing some of your own human frailties, weaknesses, and mistakes. We all have weaknesses, you know, and when you stand up in front of others and show that you're not afraid to admit yours, you create a safe, intimate climate where others can acknowledge their personal shortcomings as well.

Principle #7--When You Speak in Public, Nothing "Bad" Can Ever Happen!

One thing that adds to the fear of public speaking is the dread people have that something awful, terrible, or publicly humiliating will happen to them.

What if I pass out from nervous exhaustion? What if I forget everything I intended to say and am left standing there, totally speechless? What if the audience hates me and begins throwing things at me?

What if they all get up and leave after the first ten minutes? What if they snipe at me with harsh questions or comments once I'm done? What if someone in the audience tries to turn the group against me?

These could be embarrassing if they occurred. Fortunately, most of them don't happen.

TIP: If you want a good role model for developing this skill, rent a video tape of Johnny Carson's opening monologues. He was a master at using this principle. No matter how his audience responded, Carson was always ready to use their response, positive or negative, to make another joke. He simply couldn't lose, even if the material his writers provided him was rotten.

Principle #8--You Don't Have to Control the Behavior of Your Audience

To succeed as a public speaker, you don't have to control the behavior of your audience. There are certain things you do need to control--your own thoughts, your preparation, arrangements for audio-visual aids, how the room is laid out--but one thing you don't have to control is your audience. They will do whatever they do, and whatever they do will usually be "perfect."

If people are fidgety or restless, don't try to control this. If someone is talking to a neighbor, or reading the newspaper, or falling asleep, leave them alone. If people look like they aren't paying attention, refrain from chastising them. Unless someone is being intentionally disruptive, there is very little you need to control.

Principle #9--In General, the More You Prepare, the Worse You Will Do

Preparation is useful for any public appearance. How you prepare, however, and how much time you need to spend are other matters entirely.

Many of the errors in thinking we've discussed so far often creep in to people's strategies for preparation. If you have the wrong focus (i.e., purpose), if you try to do too much, if you want everyone to applaud your every word, if you fear something bad might happen or you might make a minor mistake, then you can easily drive yourself crazy trying to overprepare your talk. In these instances, the more effort you put in, the worse you probably will do.

Principle #10--Your Audience Truly Wants You to Succeed

The last principle to remember is that your audience truly wants you to succeed. Most of them are scared to death of public speaking, just like you. They know the risk of embarrassment, humiliation, and failure you take every time you present yourself in public. They feel for you. They will admire your courage. And they will be on your side, no matter what happens.

This means that most audiences are truly forgiving. While a slip of the tongue or a mistake of any kind might seem a big deal to you, it's not very meaningful or important to your audience. Their judgements and appraisals will usually be much more lenient than yours. It's useful to remind yourself of this point, especially when you think you've performed poorly.

Review Of 11 Hidden Causes Of Public Speaking Stress

1. Thinking that public speaking is inherently stressful (it's not).
2. Thinking you need to be brilliant or perfect to succeed (you don't).
3. Trying to impart too much information or cover too many points in a short presentation.
4. Having the wrong purpose in mind (to get rather than to give/contribute).
5. Trying to please everyone (this is unrealistic).
6. Trying to emulate other speakers (very difficult) rather than simply being yourself (very easy).
7. Failing to be personally revealing and humble.
8. Being fearful of potential negative outcomes (they almost never occur and even when they do, you can use them to your advantage).
9. Trying to control the wrong things (e.g., the behavior of your audience).
10. Spending too much time overpreparing (instead of developing confidence and trust in your natural ability to succeed).
11. Thinking your audience will be as critical of your performance as you might be.